Teach us pet

Our children can learn a lot from the other small creatures in the house.

Owning a pet is one of life’s true joys. I still remember spending hours among my menagerie as a child.

These animals taught me many things. I learned about life, in its most basic and un-PC way.
If you look after your pet rabbit, feed it, check its water and keep its cage clean, all is happy. You get to play with your pet, brush him, tell him all your problems and take him to school as a source of pride for pet day. You may even win a ribbon. If you do not look after it – bad things can happen. Pets can get dehydrated, sick and even die through neglect.

But of course this should never happen … shouldn’t but unfortunately does. Mum should be checking that all is well and of course Dad would notice that the cage needs repairs to keep the neighbour’s dog out. Wouldn’t he?

The reality is that it is winter. It has rained for almost three months. It is cold, wet, muddy and most of us are tucked up inside. Please spare a thought for your pets. They also need the same amount of care in winter as they do in the warmer months – in fact, in some cases, more. Pets deserve daily rations of fresh as well as dried food to keep them in tip-top shape. A smattering of old dry pellets for months on end just does not fit the bill. They need dry warm bedding and the opportunity to exercise and have adventures in a new and stimulating environment.

There are daily, weekly and monthly checklists of requirements if you are to own and keep a pet. The most important lesson is that pets are for life. The responsibility for their care belongs to you, their owners. The sooner we teach this lesson to our children, the better.
Our five-year-old is responsible for three cats, two dogs and five chickens. She has to feed them, check their water, collect their eggs, let them in and out of their cages and tuck them up at night, every day and every night. We call this ‘farming jobs’. The fact that this farming occurs in town on a ¼-acre section seems irrelevant. She is delighted to put on her hat, gloves, scarf, coat and gumboots when it is still almost dark and splash out to the chookie shed to check on her pets. Some days she finds problems. We talk about them and how we are going to solve them.

One terrible day, we found her newest chick dead in the driveway, mauled to death, by a neighbour’s dog. She was distraught. Poor little Peep-o. We collected him up, dug a hole, put him under the swan plants, had a funeral and spent the day grieving. We then talked about how we could make sure that the terrible tragedy could never happen again. We discussed closing gates, ensuring cage security at nights and talking to our neighbour. (I had to leave the talking to the neighbour part until much later as I was responsible for teaching appropriate behaviour.)

Many parents would wish to spare their child the pain of loss. It indeed was dreadful. However, I have found that there is always a lesson in life and a silver lining to be found. We should count our blessings and not our worries.

Pets teach us about life and loss. The loss of Peep-o enabled me to discuss death with our daughter. We discovered these tragic feelings and the terrible sense of guilt associated with it. We talked about the burial plans, what happens when pets die and how the circle of life continues. We are looking forward to spring, when the monarch caterpillars will emerge as bright new butterflies – flying free.

Our daughter went over to the grave site every day and said a wee prayer, often on her own, bowing her tiny head and talking to her lost pet. Then one day, it didn’t hurt anymore. Grief is like that. At the time it can seem so overwhelming, so painful and so immense that we can be smothered with our emotions. Life is a journey and pets can help take us along the road we must travel.

As a child I lost many pets. I learned that love and loss are intertwined. I learned about the process and not to fear it. I could always go and tell my other pet friends how I was feeling. They were always there to listen. A pat and a cuddle seemed to make it better.

We should not fear life and its lessons. Neither should we closet our children away from the realities and repercussions of their actions. This is how we all learn. Better to learn some valuable lessons early on and have the emotional strength and fortitude to deal with life later on. I believe that owning pets gives kids these insights. When a family member eventually dies, I believe that our child will have the experience and the understanding to deal with the emotions that she will face.

Her experience with Peep-o will equip her to process and accept life and death in a healthy and normal way. She will face whatever challenges her and know that there is life after death. This was the blessing that Peep-o gave us. (Pretty amazing for a tiny wee spotted chick.)

Great things come in small packages.

My advice as a veterinarian and a mother is that pets are a wonderful gift you can give your child.

Just take the time to check the gate is shut. Every night, even in winter.
Otherwise you too will learn a hard lesson.
Dr Heidi Ward-McGrath BVSc – veterinarian surgeon, clinician and pet lover